My Bro's Getting Married Today

So, today my friend and brother Joey is getting married. It's such a weird thought. The guys and I have been anticipating this for about a year now. It's like the hit event of 2009 or something. Thankfully though, I've recently begun to learn what exactly the real meaning is when they're on the altar saying, "I do." I'm not going to go on about the same old picture of Christ and the church, although I agree with that fully and think it's awesome. Rather, I have a different yet related part of the picture to show you.

Summer is typically wedding season. Makes sense, doesn't it? Nice weather, blue skies, warmth, and all that whatnot abound at this time of year. Yes, even in Washington, who just likes to throw random curveballs at us. But as a result of wedding season, one can't help but hear people talking about weddings. Sarrah keeps getting surrounded by women talking about how guys proposed to them (which is one of the most frightening conversations for a man to be around during) or what happens to their bodies when they're pregnant (which is just a scary thought for BOTH genders).

But at the same time, one learns about marriage through his own relationship, with people and with his significant other.

A married couple, one who is dedicated to God, should know one another deeply and intimately. Sarrah and I talk about stuff, confide in one another. It's just made us closer. When I see a married couple, particularly an older one, I like to imagine they have that kind of knowledge of each other. And it's a beautiful thing.

Along with that comes a love that is willing to forgive. Some people want a fairy tale relationship. Simply put, it doesn't exist. No relationship worth its salt is perfect. We are fallible human beings. How can we possibly expect one another to be perfect in every way? We know we are not perfect; don't expect perfection from someone else. One should love his spouse enough to forget the wrongs. And vice versa, ladies. At least if one wants a relationship to work.

Then comes life. When two people go to the altar to give their vows, they are basically forgetting their old, individual lives for this new, joint one. The man's life has been thrown away. The woman's life has been thrown away. This new life includes both of them and belongs neither to one or the other, but to both of them as if they are a single person. They work as a unit to live the life God has planned for them together. Sarrah put this really well in a line of a poem:

Separate in body but united in Christ.

Isn't that beautiful? Now that I'm back to the normal picture, here goes. Christ died for the church. We (the church) must die for Christ. Likewise, a man and a woman lay down their lives for one another. And this happens every day. A man named Cairo was telling Hanna yesterday at the wedding rehearsal/setup that if she's not willing to die for just one month, or if Joey's not willing to die for just a month, there's going to be catastrophe. But if they are, it's awesome.

I'm sure there's a lot more to it. I'm absolutely certain I don't know everything there is to know about marriage. I wonder if anyone really does? I think I had something else I wanted to write, too, but I forgot what it was. So anyways, this is what I've learned thus far from observation as well as from my own relationship. That sounded like a scientific kind of sentence.

Now, I have a wedding to attend. Have a good one!

Prayer and Trust

So I believe there are two lessons that God wants me to learn: prayer and God-reliance.

It's as if He's been urging me to embrace these two things over the past few days. I, like many people I'm assuming, am guilty of not praying as often as I should as well as trying to rely on my own strength or working towards my own glory rather than God's. Let me tell you: doing this can only disappoint you.

I think the time I started realizing what I was doing was this past Sunday. My friend Ryan preached a sermon about letting God's glory shine through our weaknesses. Now, I've been a Christian all my life. I've heard this concept before and frankly, I agree with what it's talking about. But that doesn't mean I'm necessarily good at following that principle. In fact, I hadn't been following that principle recently. That realization hit me like a train.

Right now I'm at a point in my life where I'm trying to figure out which way to go. I'm going for a degree in Integrated Multimedia. But this is a very broad field. It encompasses art, graphic design, music, audio engineering, film making, screenwriting, web design, photography, animation, and things along those lines. With so many different things to choose from, how can I know what I should be doing? This is a very uncertain part of my future.

Along with that, I know I want to attend Evergreen State College starting in Fall 2010. I would very much like to do this without loans, but it's looking more and more like I'm going to have to take one out. It costs around $17,000 a year to go if I live on-campus.

And in general, I've just been feeling like I've been trying to do things myself. Like trying to figure it all out with my own (admittedly lacking) mind. I want to do a lot of things. I'd love to write songs and record an EP sometime. I'd love to write screenplays and novels and all those cool things. Maybe making storyboards would be a good way to use what skill I have in art. But at the same time, all of these goals feel so far off like clouds in the sky, unreachable by my human hands.

All of this, without God in the mix, makes me feel crappy and negative, like there's no way I'll ever be able to do anything successfully. I also fear what would happen if I don't focus on God, which was why the sermon Ryan preached on Sunday hit me so hard; I was looking to my own success rather than God's glory, but I was having a hard time shifting my focus.

So today on my lunch break, I was reading chapter seven of a book called In a Pit With a Lion On a Snowy Day by Mark Batterson. It's a book about seizing God-ordained opportunities. Taking risks. Sounds like it would be applicable in this situation, wouldn't it? Well, it was going into my mind but it wasn't entirely convincing me.

That is, it wasn't until I came to the section about living in prayer mode. Batterson was talking about how people in prayer mode can see further than others can see and catch things others don't catch. Along with this, a previous chapter talked more about prayer, about how when we turn to God, but don't know what to actually say with words, God still hears us. Our groans, screams, and sighs are prayers as long as we come to God with them. This went into my mind and stayed because, not only are there times when I don't know what to say when I pray, but I already knew I hadn't been praying as often as I should be, nor truly turning to God for answers.

After reading this chapter I decided that, on my next break, I was going to start prayer-walking again. It's something I used to do on my breaks until my left foot started seriously hurting to walk on for too long. But now that my foot is healed I can do it. I just haven't been. So I went on my prayer-walk and lay the thoughts that weighed on me before God. I also asked Him to reveal the way, His way, to me, and to give me the strength and courage to take that path when I see it, even if it seems uncertain. I honestly, truly meant every word I said to Him. And, for the first time in a while, I felt a sense of peace. I knew in my heart that God was going to reveal His plans to me, and that those plans will be clear when it's time for me to follow. Whether or not they involve Evergreen, they will be revealed. And to be honest, they'll probably, meaning most likely, be difficult to follow, but it'll be so very worth it to do so.

So here I am at 12:48 in the morning, writing to what readers I have out in the blogosphere. I'm going to sound like a cheesy kids story when I say this, but the moral of the story (yes) lies in Proverbs 3:5-6.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths.^NIV

When we truly, honestly lay our concerns before God, and are really fully willing to submit to Him, we can feel a sense of peace because we know the answers will come. They may not come immediately, but we can rest assured that they will come on God's timing, which is the best timing. It's a lesson I've been learning since mid-May and will continue to learn for the rest of my life.

For Sparta, and For the Sake of Blogging

So, I really don't know what on earth to blog about right now. I just know I haven't in a while and...well, I feel like writing something.

Today my friend Ryan gave a sermon at church about finding God's power in weakness. Why would God want to use incredibly weak people like us to do His extraordinary work? I wish I had taken some notes because then I could list the reasons he gave, but I find I need to truly, honestly let God do His work so that He gets the glory, not let God help me with my work so that I get the credit and I say, "God helped a little."

Ryan related a story to us from Acts 19:11-20. It's a funny story about how Paul, as well as aprons and laundry that had touched Paul's skin could heal wounds and cast out demons, but exorcists who were paid to do stuff like this were incapable of doing so. They tried to cast out a demon in Jesus' name, but the demon-possessed man overpowered them all and left them running away naked and bleeding. Imagine that. A bunch of naked people running out of a building. Kind of a funny thought.

Why did this happen? The exorcists were typically in witchcraft, sorcery, and making money. Jesus was an incantation to them, the next money-making thing. To Paul, He was a real person, the real God, Who deserved the credit for every good thing. I think I've been acting like the exorcists when I should be acting more like Paul. God should get credit, not me. I don't do diddly squat.

God should get credit for every good thing. For example, love.

Simply put, I love Sarrah. Is this because I'm some amazing, loving person? I don't know. But the way I see it is this: If God is Love, He enables us to love. So if we love, God should get credit for it. That's not to say that one who doesn't believe in God is incapable of love. Rather, love exists because of God, who is everywhere around us. If not for God, I'd probably hate the lot of you and tell you all to screw yourselves and jump off a bridge.

I've got no real idea why I'm writing any of this. It's probably pretty stupid actually. I just wanted to blog about something. So, here I am...blogging. Yep. Have a nice night, stay classy, and whatnot.

Adam the Cannibal is Not an Ideal Jedi

So, out of boredom I decided to take my infamous relationship rant and run it through Google Translator. I went from English to French to German to French and ended back at English. I got some amusing results.

---

So it was slow to kill me this week?

* Cough *

I would say that in my mind lately? What was the concept entirely, I mean that I am in my blog about this? Ah, yes ... Relations.

Hello! It may complain, but not another. Well, maybe. We will see where there are here.

It was a little behind, almost a year ago. I have a daughter to eat, but I had no idea what I have all the time. I was on the ground trying to improvise. Of course, it did not work. But it was after that date, that I am, I had no idea what I'm doing when it comes to encounters or relationships. More Joey, who was at the time, recently had a relationship with the girl, now his girlfriend, told me that the relationship ended, he decided that, to date, he been regarded as a God, which leads to a girl. I took it with a heart and decided I had to wait. Not only that, but I personally am ready to.

Then it's a year later. I have good and bad sides of love, of observing my friends incursions. It reminds me very, really. What will happen if I with the false?

Let me give you an example. I know a couple before he broke the two who were Christians. Everyone continuously for more ... hmm, how do I have this relationship .... Not necessarily sex, but also very close. One could say: "Well, it must stop." But sooner or later, it loops around the suspicion and places of residence was never produced. ... Finally finished five months after the fracture. Oh man.

Now, what I would do in this situation? I would say that I remain strong. But I also know that I am not always the role model for the force. As I said in the past, we never know really what we can, as long as we in the heat of the moment. Of course, you can always say: "I was, I'm never going back." But it is, if the devil is still trying, we have tested our resolve. And most of the time ... in fact all the time ... the only way to win, is God. It is the highest.

It is like it is tempting to me asking me if I am the punishment. This question has been in my mind for a long time, as it is? I mean, if we die and in heaven, the marriage is not really something, is not it? But the Bible, love and marriage is what God has for us. He has the woman, because man alone, is not it? And Paul said:

"Now, singles and widows I say: It is good for her to remain unmarried as I am. But if they do not themselves, they should marry, because it is better to marry than to burn with passion. "

- 1 Corinthians 7:8-9

Paul was single. Ie it has not been tempted to meat. So, is not married, was easy for him. This is not the case for the majority of the population.

At the same time, I reflected on the relations in general. Hmmm. Will I be a good friend? Me and a girl like me? The girls I liked in the past, for whatever reason, what I know. But why? I doubt that this is the guitar, I am not Alex Lifeson.
Many girls I know are in relationships with boys more and more about how nature is "the best guy ever" or "perfection in every sense." I do not think I'm in this type pressure. Not only that, but also difficult to imagine a girl on me. I saw things. Like a lot.

Yes, I trust in his own questions. It is another of my problems.

Here's a question for you: Is it a pity that I can think of reason not days almost all girls, I'm almost as far? It is clear that I will not go, or the girl. But I do not know if this is good reason, or if I just make excuses.

And since I love the random notes, I give you chance Notes: dreams. Recently, I had many dreams of the girl. It could simply be a kind of buried desires, which I do not even know about to meet a girl, playing with my mind, but what happens so often lately that I am left to wonder why.

Good first dream. I had this a few weeks ago, I think. I was in a water park. There was a rocket that can be. They launch into the sky. Now, a policeman came in all the arrogant and said it was illegal and dangerous. I took his arm and told him that I use for him. For some reason, he said that me and that is why I have been attacked. I was handcuffed to a park bench outside the police station (strange, is not it?). And I know a girl from the station, after it seems that food out of it. She sat beside me and there was for me. Time, she seemed nervous. I think we almost kissed, but I can not really remember. Bare in mind that this girl is someone that I did not once. I talk to him or to see. Weird.

Then a few nights ago, I had a dream in which I married another girl that I am not interested in. Curiously, I am also the minister. I am reminded of a sign, said: "May you now kiss the bride", as I kissed the bride. Can you imagine, the ministers are to your marriage?

Finally, for whatever reason, I'm in a classroom shirt. I sat at my table and another girl (I do not have to l ') told me I have to go tanning and that is why I really want something good or. This is not an environment (or at least I am not longer seen). But this dream was strange, because I also remember being here and Duck many of us begin to dance for any reason.

What's weird is it seriously that I am not a time as any at the moment. At least as far as I can tell, I do not.

Yes, I took quite Droned about it. Then God said, 'Hey, it's time for you on the spot ", or is it my mind playing tricks me?

Sin is Salvation?

This past Sunday I went to Sarrah's church, Coram Deo, in Bremerton. The message was about suffering. The pastor, Jon, used two examples in the Bible about how suffering is part of God's plan; he cited the story of Joseph (who he described as "like a 1970's pimp with his fuzzy coat") as well as the story of Jesus. In Jesus' case, he said that even though the men who killed Jesus committed a grevious sin, it was still all part of God's plan. They were acting against God, but He knew they would and planned accordingly.

Sarrah's friend Katie, who is not Christian, was taking notes. I curiously took a look at them later on and saw a comment: "Sin is salvation?" It was something along those lines. When I read that, I kind of wondered how it could be explained. Pastor Jon had said that we don't always know how it works. There is no good answer sometimes.

The next day I was at work, which is my thinking time. Since I sit at a computer all day, there's not much for my mind to do except focus purely on work, and who wants to do that? My mind fell on this message again and I thought about it. If sin is bad, how does it all work into God's plan? Then an analogy came to mind that made sense to me. It is probably the only way I can think of to explain it.

It's like a fight. When you are in physical combat with someone, there are three things you want to do.

1. You want to exploit the opponent's weaknesses
2. You want to try to turn his strengths against him
3. You want to anticipate your opponent's moves so you can plan and react accordingly.
   

This is what it's like between God and Satan. Satan makes his move, but God knows what's going to happen and acts so that Satan's move turns against him.

When God sent down His Son to save the world, He knew that Satan would plot to kill Him. God knew that Satan would plant the seeds of hatred in the hearts of the religious leaders of the time. But God planned for it to happen. When Jesus died, Satan thought for a few days that he had won. He thought he had finally got one on God. However, what he didn't realize was that this was all part of the plan. Jesus rose on the third day, triumphant. In other words, God used Satan's strength over the hearts of wicked men against him. He knew of the weakness of men and let it happen because His triumphant plan would work. Ultimately, He won the fight.

If you have anything to add, help me out here.

So that's probably the simplest way I can think of to explain how I believe it works. I don't know if it's the best answer in the world, but it's what I can think of, anyways. But then, it isn't always for us to know the way God works.