Leadership: My Thoughts

Shortly before Spring Quarter began at OC, I got a call from Joey. He had been praying a lot about a young adult group and told me that God had put me on his heart for a position of leadership. I, figuring that Joey would know what he's talking about and that one should answer when God calls, accepted.

Joey brought up the idea of a young adult group around Winter Quarter one night when we were hanging out at Ty's house. I was excited about it. Near the end of winter I wondered if it was still gonna happen, but Joey assured me it would.

After this phone call I started wondering to myself, "What does God want me to do?" I've been trying to think of the things I'm good at and seeing how they could help.

Music: Okay, I'm a fair musician. I can play guitar, bass, and piano and, according to some accounts, sing. Maybe worship leader? But I worry that I might focus too much on the music rather than just worshiping God, so I've decided to put that out of the question for now.

Drawing: I draw, too. I'd like to try painting sometime. But how on earth does that help with leadership?

Writing: I've been writing for a long time. Creative writing is my specialty. I like writing short stories, or at least thinking them up and trying to find time to write them. But again, how does that help in a position of leadership?

Those are probably my three main skills. They don't really account for character or personality traits. I can be patient and I'd like to consider myself a good listener. I'm not rude, or at least I try not to be. There are probably other things that can be said.

One interesting thing during my phone conversation with Joey is that he expressed interest in having an actual website rather than just a MySpace or a Facebook. I hadn't told him before but I told him then that I was going to be taking a Web Page Development class this quarter. So far I'm loving it. Maybe God's trying to say something there?

I also wondered if maybe God's intending for me to be led by Him by being in this position. I know being in a leadership position will require me to be more accountable. Hmm?

Just various thoughts of mine that I felt like sharing.

Fellowship

So earlier tonight I met up with my Bible study group, Momentum Ministries, in the Student Center after my English class. We were talking about community, one of my personal favorite subjects to talk about since community is awesome. During the discussion, I was reminded of a few things I hadn't really thought of.

As we talked, I found times to express my thoughts. The question was, "What is required to build a good community?" After someone brought up that we should have the desire to help our brothers and sisters when we can, I spoke up with my thought.

I think the desire to help others is an awesome thing. I really do. But I also believe that, conversely, we should have a desire to be helped.

Don Miller put it really well in his book Blue Like Jazz. He said that he used to pray a lot for his friends but never for himself because he felt that it was selfless. Unfortunately, I don't have my copy of the book with me (I think I lent it to my uncle) so I can't remember how, but Miller came to realize that such a thing wasn't selfless; it was prideful. He was basically going with the old "I can do it myself" mentality, but that's obviously not a good mentality to have.

In my opinion, the same thing applies to our circle of friends. It is so essential not to isolate ourselves in our own little world. God made us to be with people; it's all over the Bible.

Back during Winter Quarter of 2008, I remember hanging with Ty and Joey and various others after my classes. We'd usually go out to eat. One of our most frequent dining places was King's Wok Buffet in Silverdale. Those were some of the best times of winter. Before that there was the Winter Conference. Joey, Sedy, Andrew and I all shared a room and got to know each other a lot better through the nights we spent talking and praying about a bunch of things. It was awesome.

Coming back to the discussion, we continued talking about community and I, thinking about winter of 2008, brought up that community doesn't necessarily have to be Bible studies and prayer meetings. Not to say those aren't really great; they just aren't the only thing. I was just hanging out with my friends (who were all fellow believers) and I felt this strong sense of fellowship and genuine caring for one another. It's what I loved about winter.

Just to sort of add to that, the spring afterwards sucked. I was taking online classes and I was laid off from my job. So I didn't see a lot of my friends. Sometimes, but not much. I felt alone and it was kind of frightening really.

That's not to say that I can't handle myself alone. I do a lot of things by myself. After work I go to school and go to classes with a completely different group of people, most of whom I will probably never see outside that classroom. So, in essence, I'm still by myself.

But what was this realization I had? I mentioned being reminded of something involving community. Well, I realized during the discussion that I was being prideful. I was always there to help my friends when they needed it; Andrew asked me to be his prayer partner over the summer and I said "Absolutely;" Joey asked me to come to his house a couple weekends from now to help him and a group of other guys with manual labor work; other friends come to me with their problems. But rarely do I ever talk to them about my own issues. I act as if none of them would want to be bothered by my problems but I know that's not necessarily true.

It was just interesting. I love constant reminders of things I've learned. Goodness knows I need them as I'm obviously a forgetful person. It's easy to get distracted in this world. But I need to remember to be distracted by God and His ways.

That is all. Have a good night, everyone!

Funny How God Works Sometimes

So here I am, sitting at my computer reading my friends' blogs. I wanted to blog about something, but I didn't know what. What do I have to say that's good enough for a blog? Has anything interesting happened recently? But then I thought of something.

As you might know, I'm currently sick. I've got a cold and a come-and-go sinus headache that can go from either a minor annoyance to feeling like my head is splitting open. Not that great, eh? But this isn't the big part of my blog.

You see, earlier this month I found out that my workplace needed people to work overtime hours over Spring Break. There is one project that they want to get done by April, so it was approved that anyone working on that project can work overtime...as long as they're still on that project.

I had been on this project for a while this month. But then this past week I was put on other stuff. Stuff that wasn't so urgent. Stuff that wasn't approved for overtime. I started secretly thinking that maybe they didn't think I would be a help in reaching the deadline or something. Ridiculous, but it was going through my head. However, this was actually the brilliance of God working; I just didn't realize it at the time.

On Wednesday, I got sick. As I got out of bed my head started hurting like mad and I felt like I could hardly hold it up. So I called in sick and spent the day trying to recuperate. It sort of worked; I went into work the next morning. I seriously regretted it because I felt like crap all day , but I still did it. I was very careful not to infect anyone, though.

So Friday came and I still felt like crap. The boss had decided that Saturday and Sunday required eight mandatory hours from everyone working on this overtime project. I had previously been on the list to be there, too. But obviously, I didn't want to. So I asked my supervisor a question:

I haven't been working on [insert project name here]. Am I still expected to be here tomorrow?

He said I wasn't and to have a good weekend.

Now, I only just realized it, but I think God decided to have me put on other, not-overtime-approved projects because He knew I'd get sick and would need (or at least want) the weekend to recover. Funny how God works, huh?

Thank you, Lord.

My Top Four Poems

Lake of Levande (A Pantoum)
From this mystical lake
I see a wondrous light
Shining from the water's wake
It's too far for my sight

I see a wondrous light
It fills the forest clearing
It's too far for my sight
Yet too quiet for my hearing

It fills the forest clearing
A noise all around
Yet too quiet for my hearing
'Tis a beautiful sound

A noise all around
I hear an angel choir
'Tis a beautiful sound
Bringing passion's fire

I hear an angel choir
Singing for Christ's sake
Bringing passion's fire
From this mystical lake

- 12/20/2008

When Heroes Become Villains
I knew a man at the doctor's place
He was there for a concussion
His doctor seemed a kindly guy
The man had a smile on his face
While we had a discussion
I saw a twinkle in his eye

He's no longer there
He was taken from this world
By the man who was entrusted with his care

I knew a girl from near my place
A sweet, five-year-old child
She lived with her single mother
She learned to tie her shoelace
She'd show me with a smile
With innocence like no other

But now she's a ghost
She was taken from this world
By the one who should have loved her the most


- 12/22/2008

Deceivers

Lord, today I ask, send the demons on their way
They're always out to get me
Trying to torment me
With the constant tempting fashion of the flesh

They're always trying really hard to send me down sin's way
Absolutely lying
Deceivingly denying
Their evils so that I will be enmeshed

But Lord, You have a path I choose to follow now today
For me You went and died
With You I am allied
The healing of Your light makes my slate fresh

- 12/23/2008

The Pointless Cliche Poem
To me it seems a little cliche
To write a poem 'bout the sun and a tree
That well overused rhyming pattern
Of a constant continuing A-B-C-B

But when you really want to write
You have this nagging, insatiable urge
To find something, anything, that gives you ideas
So the thought and the want can at last be purged

Trees are like giant people, you see
They live and they breath, just like us
They even have others who cut them down
Occasionally, they'll get hit by a bus

The sun shines so brightly over that hill
Peeking with caution at the small lives
It rises above us to light up the day
He wears sunglasses and helps us to thrive

Alas, you see, I've nothing to write
No inspiration of which to speak
But yet this urge, it rises in me
And so I write crap, man I'm a geek

But wait! It seems I forgot about love
That feeling that causes our hearts to pound
It shortens our breath and takes away reason
And when it is true, we leap and we bound

And so, I guess that's all I can say
The only things I can think of to write
With these final words I depart from this place
I'M GOING STIR CRAZY! And now, good night.


- 12/26/2008

Foolishness and Unintelligence

For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God. For it is written:

"I will destroy the wisdom of the wise;
the intelligence of the intelligent I will frustrate."

Where is the wise man? Where is the scholar? Where is the philosopher of this age? Has not God made foolish the wisdom of the world? For since in the wisdom of God the world through its wisdom did not know him, God was pleased through the foolishness of what was preached to save those who believe. Jews demand miraculous signs and Greeks look for wisdom, but we preach Christ crucified: a stumbling block to Jews and foolishness to Gentiles, but to those whom God has called, both Jews and Greeks, Christ the power of God and the wisdom of God. For the foolishness of God is wiser than man's wisdom, and the weakness of God is stronger than man's strength.

Brothers, think of what you were when you were called. Not many of you were wise by human standards; not many were influential; not many were of noble birth. But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong. He chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things—and the things that are not—to nullify the things that are, so that no one may boast before him. It is because of him that you are in Christ Jesus, who has become for us wisdom from God—that is, our righteousness, holiness and redemption.

- 1 Corinthians 1:18-30 NIV

Pastor Stan brought this passage up right in the beginning of the Sunday night service. Now, I don't know about you, but it makes me smile.

In the first paragraph, we see Paul's sense of humor in a way; we're out preaching a foolish message. The eyes of the world see the fact that God created everything and that Jesus died and rose to save everyone as something utterly ridiculous. The intelligent will say, "That can't be right." Even Don Miller, a Christian author, says in his book Blue Like Jazz that, when he thinks about it, the whole "Jesus thing" sounds silly. But, as we all know, the wisdom of man can not be used to find God. One can only find God by being moved by the Spirit and accepting Jesus. Entire Trinity right there.

Next bit:

"The foolishness of God is wiser than a man's wisdom, and the weakness of God is stronger than a man's strength."

I know a lot of intelligent people. Some of them are humble. Some don't really care if people notice their smarts. Others, however, like to rub how smart and witty they are in people's faces. I can't stand those kinds of people, mainly because they make me feel stupid because I can't keep up with them. I know I'm not stupid, but I've never really been "smart" per se; like street or book smart, I guess. Well, I might be sort of book smart. You see, my talents lie in art, something that the intelligent are uninterested in because it's not always logical. So I'm viewed as a fool.

However, I have God. And God, even at His stupidest, is smarter than any man. He is also, at his weakest, stronger than any man. Amazing? I would never think of God as "foolish" or "weak," but it's only an expression after all that means that even the smallest bit of God's power and wisdom outmatches any weight lifter or Doctor of Science.

Now, I'm gonna point out the last paragraph. Read it. Read it again. And read it again. You know who that paragraph is talking about?

Me! I'm not influential in this world. I'm not born of noble birth. And I'm certainly not wise by human standards. And yet...what was that? God chose the foolish people - people like ME - to shame the wise? He chose the weak people - like ME - to shame the strong? And lastly, he chose the lowly? The despised? Those who are not? I am those people! He chose ME to do these things.

If you read my last post, you'll know I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to find out what I'm supposed to do with my life. Or even what I CAN do. You'll also know if you've read further back that I don't have the greatest self-esteem in the world. So, when this passage popped up that Sunday night...well, it was definitely God speaking to me.

"HEY, I CHOSE YOU. DON'T WORRY ABOUT THINGS SO MUCH."

Yeah. So that's something I wanted to share. An update, if you will.